Monday, June 01, 2009

The Stalker

you identify an emptiness
you dream of getting rid of it
you feel that you can do something about it
you seek out to do it
you are helped by someone who can get you there
he promises you happiness
you are influenced by him
you are burdened by his sphere of influence
but he promises you truth
you sometimes disagree with him
you slowly lose interest in him
he continues to pour a piece of his mind
you want to do this yourself
you try doing it your way
his advice turn to deaf ears
you bask at the easiness of the task
but you doubt yourself at the last step.
he has influenced you subconsciously
you stop doing it your way fearing failure
you run back to him
he censures, sermonizes
you decide to obey him
you realize that there is only one way - the right way
he smiles a smile of victory
you still aren't entirely convinced by him
you trudge along with him, compulsively
his nervous gait has a sense of assurance.
you question your motive.
you ask, "with happiness, what is the point of living anymore? there is nothing left to prove"
he turns a blind eye at your quandary
you introspect
you discuss, but there is no one to discuss with
he coerces you to try harder
you shudder at your apparent lack of confidence
you ask yourself "Who needs it? and for what reason?" and answer "no one, and for no reason"
he empathizes, and tries to convince you
you, accept defeat, but there is no turning back
you move ahead, swallowing fear and pain
but he refuses to walk in front
you feel his hands deserting you
you are now forced to walk alone
he turns from a guide to a stalker
you are a dead man walking, waiting for time to pass
you don't even trust your shadow anymore
he warns you about going too fast
you ignore the rules like sand
you step into the room
you feel the truth

you always knew the truth
you are surrounded by the answers
but the questions are not enough..
you are insufferable..
you are insufferable..

3 comments:

you prat ! said...

er.. excuse maadi (this one was too abstract for me), but who's The Stalker actually?

me? said...

I really dont know... Maybe it is the guilt, maybe it is the baggage that you come along with, maybe it is the voice inside that guides you or maybe it is just your shadow..

the shadow that guides you by walking ahead in the morning and the same shadow that stalks you in the evening..

Or something like that :)

you prat ! said...

whoooaaaaa! tooo deeeeeep i say !
:P